Waste Not, Want Not

I have a confession to make.  I am a food waster.  It kills me.  It gives me guilt.  It makes me hate myself.  But I do it a LOT!  I have really tried to be more conscious about my food planning so that I DON'T waste, but sometimes I just mess up and have to throw away food that I've let go bad.

I have done a few things to stop this terrible habit.  One thing, is I bought a juicer.  So any veggie or fruit that is about to spoil goes right into my juicer and I drink up the tasty, near rotten beverage (I kid...If it's really rotten, I toss it).  The other thing I've started to do is just cook everything in my fridge and put it all on a plate.  Like this little concoction that actually turned out to be a really good deconstructed Cobb Salad.

Here's What I Did:
Boil some eggs (Put eggs in a pot, cover with water and turn on high.  Once water begins to rapidly boil, turn off the burner and let eggs sit in the water for 15 minutes.  Peel and cut).  I cooked bacon (Heat oven to 400 degrees and cook bacon in the oven until crisp).  I sauteed mushrooms (melt coconut oil over high heat.  Add sliced mushrooms and cook until browned, about 8 minutes.  Salt & Pepper).  Then slice up any veggies you have (tomatoes, cucumber, etc.)  Add some greens dressed in a little olive oil and some vinegar (I used balsamic).

And there you have it.  A delicious lunch or dinner, hell, even breakfast.  And nothing went bad in your fridge.  And now you're happy because you're not wasteful.  Waste not, want not.  
 

Poke Doke

Raw tuna is probably one of my top 5 favorite foods.  It's just so freaking delicious.  Take me to a sushi restaurant and try to make me order a sushi roll.  I don't need all that filler crap.  Just serve me up a filet of raw tuna and set me free!  (Here's another tuna recipe I made awhile back)

I first discovered tuna poke (prounced Po-Kay) on an episode of Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives. This dish is so easy to make and so rewarding.

Here's What You Do:
Go to a GOOD grocery store that you trust (Whole Foods or Fresh Market), or if you're lucky to live by the water, go to your local seafood shop and purchase a hunk of sushi grade tuna.

(And here's where sometimes it sucks to write a food blog.  You see, I try to provide you all with the information I like to know about food.  So in writing this particular blog, I looked up what parameters fish must fall under to make them "sushi grade" because I was curious myself.  And what I discovered was this.  There are none.  Nope...it's a marketing scam.  No one regulates it.  So go with my first recommendation of buying fish from somewhere you trust, like Whole Foods or Fresh Market.  Just look for a deep red color and make sure it smells like the ocean, but isn't fishy) 

Next, cut up your tuna into small squares.  Slice some green onion and cube some avocado.  I know you're not going to like the following, because there are no measurements, you just do it to your liking.  Just remember not to go overboard with any one ingredient.  What I did next was just sprinkled a little soy sauce, a little sesame oil, a little lime juice, some toasted sesame seeds, the green onion and the avocado over the raw tuna and lightly tossed it.  Now just give it a little taste and adjust the seasonings if necessary.  I like mine to be a little more on the sesame oil side, so I usually add in a little more.  If you want to spice it up you can add in some jalapeno or some sambal oelek.  You can also add some chopped cilantro for an extra layer of flavor.

Then, serve it on lettuce cups, or if you're like me, just break out some chop sticks and eat it right out of the bowl.  Yet another thing you can create at home that will be MUCH cheaper and more delicious.  I actually paid $12 for two healthy sized tuna filets.  So I made this Poke one day and I made some spicy tuna burgers the next day. 

Do it.  Fish-o.

Tuna Nooner

This, my friends, is probably my favorite comfort food of all times.  Tuna Noodle Casserole.  You either love it, or you hate it.  But for me, it's poor man's food at its finest.  It's noodly, creamy, cheesy, mushroomy.  My mom used to make it at least once a week when we were kids, and we looked forward to it.  We'd beg for her to make tuna nooner.  That's what we called it.  My sister secretly awaits for her hubby to go out of town so she can make this dish because he hates it.  When I'm having a bad day, it's the only thing that can pull me out of my funk.  It's good the old fashioned way.  But these days, with my refined taste buds (haha...that's a joke...there's nothing refined about me), I like to take it to another level.  Rather than open a can of cream of mushroom soup, I make my own cream of mushroom.  And I top it with breadcrumbs so that it has some crunch.  Because I love crunch.

Here's What You Need:
Package of egg noodles
2 cans of tuna, drained (I like tonno, packed in oil)
1 8 oz. package of button mushrooms
1/4 cup of flour
4 tablespoons of butter
2 cups of milk
Cheddar Cheese (as much or as little as you like, I like a lot)
Salt & Pepper
Breadcrumbs
2 tablespoons of olive oil  (and a little extra to drizzle over breadcrumbs)

Here's What You Do:
Preheat oven to 350.  Cook your noodles according to the package.  In a large sauce pan saute mushrooms in olive oil until browned.  Add the butter and flour to the mushrooms and coat everything evenly.  Cook flour for about 2 minutes.  Add in the milk and whisk like hell so you don't get any chunks.  Season with salt and pepper.  Add tuna, noodles and cheese and stir until everything is combined.  Place mixture into a greased baking dish and sprinkle breadcrumbs over the top.  Drizzle olive oil over breadcrumbs and bake for about 25 minutes until everything is brown and bubbly.

Then put on a pair of your comfiest PJ's (unless you're already in them).  Get yourself a big ol' scoop of Tuna Noodle casserole, and chow down while watching the smuttiest, mindless, crap you can find on tv (shouldn't be too hard).  If you need another helping, take one.  And I promise all your worries will tuna-melt away.  

 

Thighsman Trophy

I think I'm in love with chicken thighs.  And I am a total freak when it comes to chicken.  Before I make anything with chicken, I do minor surgery on my piece of meat.  I cut off weird tendons, skin, veins.  I throw away the majority of the piece of chicken before I cook it because it grosses me out.  I know, it's gross.  Chicken scares me.  But I'm not afraid of slow-cooking chicken thighs.  And I'll tell you why.  When you slow-cook chicken thighs, all of the things that freak me out about chicken disappear.  And they become tender pieces of delicious, flavorful meat that melt in your mouth.

And since I bought the bulk package of chicken thighs from Costco, I needed another recipe to slow-cook them, other than Coq au Vin.  So I tried this one.  If you are unfamiliar with the Pioneer Woman, I will say this about her.  I'm not the biggest fan of her show, just because it's a LITTLE cheesy for me.  But I love the way she writes and I LOVE her recipes.  Haven't met a bad one yet.  This one in particular was so good.  I love olives.  I love Spanish style food.  I put it over some couscous, another new obsession of mine, I had a delicious and healthy little dinner.

HERE'S WHAT I DID DIFFERENT: 
Rather than use a whole chicken, I used chicken thighs.  I didn't have a green pepper, so I used my organic red and yellow peppers from my Bountiful Basket.  I didn't have wine, so any reference to wine was substituted with chicken stock.  Instead of your regular run-of-the-mill olives, I used California green olives.  I'm obsessed with these too.  They have such a unique flavor.  Really meaty and buttery and not as olive-y as the ones with pimentos, although, I'm sure it would be delicious with those too.  I've never met an olive I didn't like.

Really great dish.  Lots of flavors.  Definite comfort food.  

Coke O Van

(Believe me, this is an amazing dish...as in dinner party, impress your friends, dish)

Coq Au Vin.  Translation?  Cockerel (Chicken) in wine.  Pronunciation?  Coke o van.  There's your French lesson for the day.

My step-mother, Sue, is an amazing cook.  We are actually a lot alike in the kitchen.  We both like simple foods with great ingredients.  We both find cooking to be therapeutic.  We both keep clean kitchens.  We both love food.  We both like a glass of wine in our hand while we cook.  And I can't speak for her on this, but I would bet that her favorite room in the house is her kitchen.  I make a few of her recipes on a regular basis.  Many of them are my "go-to's" 

There's one dish that my dad ALWAYS raves about that she makes and it is Coq au vin.  I have never tried her coq au vin, but knowing her cooking, it is delicious.  And knowing my dad, he wouldn't talk on and on about something if it wasn't outstanding.  So luckily when he was here, we went to, yep you guessed it...COSTCO and he bought us some chicken thighs.  And so wanting to actually experience this coq au vin I have heard so much about, I decided to make it for dinner.  So I asked her to send me the recipe and she told me that it's actually an Emeril recipe.  And I love Emeril.  I have eaten at 3 of his restaurants, so if his name is attached to a recipe, I'll try it.  And if Sue swears by this recipe and uses it as one of HER "go-to's", I trust that it is wonderful.

Here's The Recipe:
http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/emeril-lagasse/classic-coq-au-vin-recipe.html 

Here's What I Changed:  
First of all, I halved the recipe.  Instead of 2 whole chickens, I used 5 chicken thighs, skinless.  I left out the shallot, just because I didn't have one.  Which is strange, cause I usually have a shallot sitting around.  Seriously.  I used crimini mushrooms instead of white button mushrooms, cause that's what I had. I used a Cotes-du-Rhone, cause it's one of my most favorite wines.  And then instead of serving it on egg noodles, I served it over mashed potatoes, cause I had a potato I needed to mash.   

It was beyond delicious.  The sauce is so rich.  Not heavy and gravy rich.  Rich in flavor.  This is a must try.  And a definite crowd pleaser.  So thank you, Sue.  Feel free to share more of your "go-to" meals!  I have yet to find one I didn't like!       

 

Bountiful Baskets - Good for Memphis

So...A dear friend of mine turned me on to something GOOD!  Something REAL GOOD.  And I'm here to tell you about it.  It's called Bountiful Baskets.  It's a food Co-op that offers produce baskets, organic produce baskets, artisan bread, sandwich bread and tortillas every other week.  The goal is to offer more produce to families for less money.  And who doesn't like that idea?  It's a great idea.  Look them up.  Sign up.  And fill up.  This is what came in my first organic basket.  Look at those carrots!  And that kale!  And those heirloom tomatoes!

I was so excited when I got my basket home.  When I picked it up, I didn't really take the time to look at what I got, I just threw it in my bag and went home.  But I was pleasantly surprised when I unpacked it and found delicious heirloom tomatoes, kale, butternut squash, peppers, strawberries, apples, bananas, Brussels sprouts and a rutabaga.  Yep.  That rooty looking white veggie on the right is a rutabaga.  At least that's what I think it is.  And so that's how I treated it.

Here's What I Did:  

I peeled the so-called rutabaga.  It wasn't easy mind you.  That thing was a beast.  I then peeled a sweet potato that I had sitting around and I cut them both into 1 inch cubes and I roasted them with some olive oil and salt and pepper for about 20 minutes in a 400 degree oven.

Meanwhile, I sauteed 2 pieces of bacon, cut up and set it aside when it was crispy.  Then I added some onion, garlic, jalapeno and mushrooms to the bacon grease.  Shut up.  Bacon grease is good for you.  At least it is if you tell yourself that it is.  I then added in my rutabaga and sweet potato pieces and sauteed them until everything was all nice and browned and crunchy.

Then I topped it with an over easy egg.  Yes, I'm obsessed with the over easy egg.  It's just so damn good.  And I need the practice on making them.  So give me a break.  Then I added in some green onion.  It was really good.  And thanks to bountiful baskets, I've crossed rutabaga off my MUST COOK list.

So thanks Bountiful Baskets!  Thanks for bringing such an amazing thing to Memphis.  Lord knows we need to introduce fresh fruits and vegetables at a lower cost to families in these parts!  Thanks for all you do.  Can't wait for my next basket of surprises!     

Snow Day Short Ribs

I know it's not the prettiest picture...but this is meat people.  Channel your inner caveman

Well hello there!  I hope everyone is having an excellent day.  Shoveling themselves out of snow storms, trying out the newest in rain gear.  It's been one hell of a cold year.  We haven't gotten much snow in Memphis.  But it's been cold.  And when it's cold I want comfort.  And comfort to me is slow-cooked meat.

My dad came to visit a few weeks ago.  Anyone who knows my dad knows that the man is an avid shopper at Costco.  I mean, he's their most loyal customer.  As in, he will be in an unnamed grocery store's cheese aisle and decide that he's going to drive 20 miles out of the way to go to Costco for THEIR cheese.  Never mind convenience.  Costco's cheese is more economical, and just tastes better.  Costco really should consider him as their spokesperson.  He is their biggest fan!

On one of our Costco trips, we decided to purchase the boneless short ribs.  After looking at a ton of different recipes online, I realized that I could combine a few different recipes and have the perfect storm.  Ok, fine.  The perfect short rib FOR the perfect storm. So for those of you who are experiencing the crazy weather we've been having...stay warm, drive safely if you have to, or just stay home!  And make short ribs. 

Here's What You Need:  

Whole Shortribs  (we used boneless, but you could use bone in, I just find bone in to be ridiculously overpriced)
Salt And Pepper, to taste
1/2 cup flour for dredging
3 Tablespoons Olive Oil 
12 cipollini onions, peeled and cut in half
1 package of baby bella mushrooms, cleaned and cut in half 
4 cloves of garlic, minced 
1 cup Red Wine (I used a Chianti) 
32 ounces, Beef Stock
5 sprigs of thyme
2 Tablespoons Minced Fresh Rosemary 
2 Tablespoons Grainy Mustard 
1 cup Heavy Cream

 

Here's What You Do: 

 

Preheat oven to 300

Heat olive oil in a heavy pot over high heat. Generously salt and pepper your short ribs. Coat each short rib in flour.  Sear all sides of the short ribs until nicely browned.  Remove the short ribs to a plate.

Add onion to pan and cook for about 3-5 minutes, just until they have a bit of brown on the outside.  Add in mushrooms and garlic and cook another 5 minutes.  Add in wine and beef broth and scrape up all the brown bits left behind in the pot. Add thyme and return short ribs to the pot.  Bring liquid back to a boil, then cover the pot and place into the oven for 2 1/2-3 hours.  I checked my short ribs at 2 1/2 hours and decided that they were tender, but another 30 minutes and they'd be perfect.  So I went the full 3 hours.
 
After they are finished, fish out the thyme sprigs and throw them away.  Stir in mustard, rosemary and cream and raise the heat back up a bit until the sauce has thickened.  It's not going to be a gravy, so if it's too thin for you, you can make a cornstarch/water mixture and add that to thicken it up more.

Serve short ribs over polenta.  I used quick cooking polenta and added in shredded Beemster cheese for an added treat (think really nutty parmesan cheese with an aged cheddar flavor - at least that's how I would describe it).  Another cheese my dad will travel far for.  Though, he lives in Pittsburgh, and he gets his cheese at the Pennsylvania Macaroni Company.  Which is about 20 miles from his house.  Maybe the man just loves his cheese.  Have cheese, will travel.  Love him.  Did I mention that he showed up on our doorstep with 5, YES, 5 blocks of amazing cheese (Stilton, Beemster, Asiago, Morbier and Piave - look em up if you've never had them)!   

Anyways, dad loved the ribs. And the best part?  The next day, you can make short rib tacos!  Here's to staying warm!  

 

This Blog May BUG You. Out.

I love you guys.  It's so flattering when people ask where I've been, tell me I need to write something, or encourage me to keep blogging.  I wish my blog was my job and I could devote all my energy into it.  But alas...real life calls.  So here's where I have been...for all of you who wondered.  And hey...thanks for wondering.  Makes a girl feel real special.  

I'm gonna tell you a little story.  It's a kitchen story.  It's a food story.  It's a terrifying story. And it'll bug you out.  But I'm here for you.  And so when I learn hard lessons, I like to pass them along so that you know what to do if you find yourself in my situation.   

It was a chilly Wednesday evening.  I had just gotten off work.  It was around 8:00 pm.  I was hungry.  No. I was starving.  I work in a pretty freakin' delicious restaurant.  And I'm surrounded by good food the whole time I'm there.  I've been there almost 2 years now and I still eat everything.  That says a lot.

Anyways...back to my horror story.  I was starving when I got off work.  So I looked in the fridge as I always do, and I assessed the situation, then answered the same question I always ask myself, "What can I make with what I have?"  Lucky for me, I love good food.  So I usually have some pretty good shit in my fridge.  And this particular night I discovered that I had everything to make some shrimp and grits. So as I always do, I looked up a bunch of recipes, picked out the parts I didn't like in each of them, and combined all the good parts to make a meal.

I'm in the kitchen, Alabama Shakes Pandora station playing on the JamBox.  I'm all clean and showered.  I'm in my pj's.  I'm drinking a tasty glass of red wine.  Life is pretty damn good.  I've got my mixture of chicken stock and milk boiling so I can add the grits.  I've got my grits measured out.  I glance over at the iPad and see this teeeeeeeny, wieeeeeene bug crawl across it.  So I smash it, wonder in my head, "Where the hell did that come from?", and then instinctively looked over at my grits.  And that's when the horror story begins, my friends.

There were VISIBLE bugs, teeny, tiiiiiny BUGS all up in my grits.  So I immediately throw the grits in the sink and run the garbage disposal, all the while running scalding hot water.  I wanted those suckers to DIE.  Once I felt I had run the disposal at the maximum kill time, I thought to myself, "Well, shit. Now I have no grits for my shrimp and grits.  SURELY, I have some more somewhere in my pantry." 

And that's when I searched my pantry.  And I found some more grits.  Yes.  Some more BUG FILLED GRITS, DAMN IT!  So what do I do?  Freak the fuck out.  In my pantry.  I ripped that bitch apart.  I looked in my flour...BUGS, my rice...BUGS, my pasta...my pasta that was an in air-tight (so I thought) container...BUGS!!!! They were in everything.  Everything except the spices, the sugar and the salt.

So I threw EVERYTHING away.  And I did a Google search on pantry bugs.  And I found a few different things that they could be.  Either flour bugs, pantry moths or weevils.  But whatever the hell they were, they are all gone now.  Like I said...I had to throw away everything!  They were in unopened boxes of food, EVERYWHERE.  So I tossed everything.  The whole time doing the freaky bug dance like a maniac and screaming here and there in complete terror!  I tossed everything in a trash bag, then took the trash bag out to the dumpster.  I bleached the pantry so much that my hands cracked from so much bleach use (remind me to get a pair of rubber gloves), I washed any appliance that was in the pantry once by hand, and once in the dishwasher.  I then re-bleached everything in the cabinet.  Then I let it air out, and I bleached everything again.  Then I put bay leaves everywhere in my pantry.  According to something I read, these pests don't like the smell of bay leaves.  And I was desperate.  I would have drawn a pentagram, lit candles and spoke in tongues if that's what I had to do to never be in this situation again.

And then I didn't cook.  For a LONG time.  Because I didn't want to restock my pantry just to throw everything away again.  Have you bought a spice lately?  They're fucking expensive.  And I had about 45 spices.  In my head, that's about 150 bucks worth of spices I had to restock.

You know what else I do now?  I freeze any pantry item I buy for 3 days.  You know why?  Because most likely, the reason I had this issue in the first place, is because bugs lay eggs in flour, rice, cereal, pasta, etc.  And then you bring said item home from the grocery store.  And if you don't use them quick enough, these bugs will grow and mate!  And freak you the fuck out.  I am having trouble writing this right now.  It's such a creepy, crawly story.  Can't stop itching.  

So here's your lesson.  The next time you buy an item from your pantry.  Freeze it.  For 3 days. Also, put bay leaves on all your pantry shelves.  While researching these bugs, I read serious horror stories.  Like such an infestation that you could see the bugs flying around.  I shudder to think.

I have restocked my pantry since this awful incident and so far so good.  And trust me, I examine everything with a microscopic eye before I cook it now.

Nothing like a good ol' bug infestation to ruin your life!        

   

Bitchin' Brunch

Sometimes I amaze myself.  I hit a major home run on this brunch dish.  This is how my brain works. 

The other day I bought some mushrooms to make sauteed mushrooms over polenta for dinner.  Then I started feeling pretty crappy and I decided that the only thing I had the energy to cook was a sweet potato.  So that was my dinner that night.  A sweet potato and a spinach salad that was already made.  

The next day I was Pinteresting and I found this recipe that was for sauteed mushrooms and Brussels sprouts with an egg over easy broken open on top.  It looked amazing and I made mental note that I would have to recreate this dish in the near future.

The day after that I wanted to try my hand at making a goat cheese souffle, so I went out and bought some goat cheese.  That night I worked and didn't get home until 2 am, so my dinner was a handful of almonds.  I know, Mom, that's not exactly a good dinner.  But sometimes life gives you rotten lemons that you can't do shit with.  Needless to say, when I woke up the next morning, I was RAVENOUS.  And so I decided to make a goat cheese and scallion polenta topped with sauteed mushrooms, onion, garlic, jalapenos and an over easy egg.  And because today I was craving country ham, I added that to the mix and here you have it.  The best damn meal I have created in awhile.  I mean, it was so good I'd put it up against some of the finer dishes in the best restaurants in Memphis.  NO JOKE!

Here's What I Did:

I made polenta using 1/2 cup of quick cooking polenta and 1 1/2 cups of milk.  Bring the milk to a boil and then slowly whisk in the polenta like a crazy person, avoiding the hot lava explosions that end up erupting when you make polenta.  Stir like a psycho for about 5 minutes, then add in one of those small logs of goat cheese.  Stir to melt the cheese and take off heat.  Add in 2 chopped scallions (aka green onion), green and white parts.

Next, I sauteed half an onion diced, a package of white button mushrooms, sliced thick, a small clove of diced garlic, and half a jalapeno pepper, diced.  I've been using coconut oil to saute things lately because it's much better for you and I have found that I LOVE the taste of mushrooms sauteed in coconut oil.  It's amazing.  Almost sweet, yet still savory. Salt and pepper the mushroom mixture then add in a little chicken stock, just a splash and bring to a boil.  Add in a splash of half and half and mix until sauce has thickened.  In another pan, cook your eggs over easy.  

Put a heaping scoop of your goat cheese and green onion polenta on your plate.  Top with mushroom mixture.  Then top that with your egg.  Sprinkle with a little parsley.  Then break the egg yolk levee and watch as the yolk floods everything on your plate.  Serve with a side of country ham, or whatever meat option you prefer, or nothing at all.  The dish stands on its own.  It really didn't need the ham.  Try it this weekend.  Would be perfect with a mimosa.         

   

Food Fail

My sideways photo of banana chips.  Thank you, possessed computer.

Sometimes things don't work in the kitchen.  Like making your own banana chips.  I've been looking for a healthy banana chip, but keep finding that most of them are fried and sugared.  Or sugared and then fried.  But I've yet to find an all natural banana chip.  So what did I do?  I tried to make my own.  I cooked these for about an hour at 240 degrees.  And what did I find?  That homemade banana chips SUCK.  They just don't taste as good as fried, sugared banana chips.  They have a weird texture.  They're chewy and crunchy at the same time and just don't have much flavor.  But I won't be discouraged.  I will figure out banana chips.  I will go buy a food dehydrator if I have to.

Cheers to shit not working in the kitchen.  Don't let it stop you from trying new things. 

Happy Birthday Mom!!

I always rack my brain when my mother's birthday comes around, trying to figure out what gift to give her.  You know, I want to express my love to her and all, but buying her something seems so fake.  Not to mention she needs more shit in her house like she needs a swift kick to the head (although maybe that would stop the zombie...hmmm).  You see, my wonderful step-father, Bob, is a hoarder.  Just kidding, he's not.  Just kidding, he is.  Not a filthy, gross hoarder.  He just buys a lot of things.  Car parts, pens, coins, collectible cars, law books that he probably hasn't opened since 1993, paperwork, things he buys at flea markets, etc. (I love you Bob, and I love all your things, but maybe it's because I don't live with them!)  To give my mom something that is going to clutter her house is totally unnecessary.  So this year, I'm going with a blog entry!  Happy birthday mom, from your cheap ass daughter.  I do love you with every ounce of my body and then some.             

When I was a little girl, I would LOVE it when we would bake pies.  (She makes the best lemon meringue and banana cream pies you've ever tasted.)  But when it was pie making day, it was OUR day.  I LOVED helping you in the kitchen.  And I truly think you welcomed my help.  I never felt like you were just appeasing me.  You're the reason I love cooking.  I would get my little chair and bring it over to the counter to stand on and you'd let me use the pastry cutter to cut the flour into the lard (don't judge my mother... the woman knows that lard makes the best crust).  Then you'd let me pour the ice water over the flour-y, lardy, goodness while you mixed it all together.  We make a great pie making team.

One day, we made a few pies that were baking in the oven and you noticed that we had some extra dough lying around.  So you rolled out the dough, had me spread butter on it and then sprinkle it with cinnamon and sugar.  Then we rolled 'em up and cut them (you'd make little notches along the roll to indicate where I could cut them...I loved that you allowed me to wield a knife, and trusted me with it at such a young age).  Then we put them on a cookie sheet and baked them at 350 for about 12 minutes.  They ended up turning out so delicious.  Like a crunchy, flaky cinnamon roll.  I remember I never had the patience to let them cool either.  I just dove right in, burnt the hell out of my mouth every time.  And it became our tradition.  When we'd make pies, we would intentionally make sure there was JUST enough dough to make our little treat.  And they made me feel SO VERY special.   

The strange this is, I'm not the biggest fan of pie.  Maybe it's because no one else makes pie as good as yours.  Maybe my taste buds just changed and I lost my pie taste buds.  We both crave savory things over sweet.  Maybe that's why I don't like pie.  Who knows what my aversion to pie is. 

Now that the weather's cooler, I often crave chicken pot pie.  So the other day I went to the store to get all the ingredients.  And when I came to the pre-packaged pie crust, I was flooded with the memory of you and I making pie.  It must be because I miss you.  So I skipped by that section and rushed home to make a homemade pie crust, because I needed to feel close to you at that point in time.  And I did make one.  And I left some extra dough.

I'd mail you one of our special cookies, but I ate them all.  What a selfish kid you raised!!  I kid, I kid.  :-)

I just thought you should know that even though we haven't lived close to each other for a long time, you are always close in my heart.  I have these little moments often.  Sometimes I catch myself eating pretzel rods while reading a book, twirling my hair, like you used to do.  I always feel close to you.  Not a day goes by that I don't think about you.  I'm so thankful that you are who I was destined to come from.  You make me a good person.  You have always supported every decision I make and encouraged me to dream. You have always given me the necessary tools to make or break myself.  And sometimes I choose to break myself.  And every time that happens, you are right there to pick me up, put back my pieces and send me back out there fighting.  Never with any shame, disappointment, or judgement.  Just absolute, honest, unconditional love.  And I can't thank you enough for that.  You're special to so many people, because you're special.  You're my rock.  You rock.  Period.  I love you so much.  If you are fortunate enough to be near my mom today, give her a great, big birthday hug from me.  Happy Birthday, beautiful momma. 

Calzone Jones

There are some foods I crave on a regular basis.  Calzones are one of these foods.  Unfortunately, I'm really picky about my calzones.  The crust has to be perfect and the filling has to be top notch.  I've had some bad calzones in my day.  Crust dry and too flaky.  Raw garlic that had too much bite.  No ricotta cheese at all!  I mean, I'm not Italian (well, except in a past life), but I just can't imagine a calzone with no ricotta cheese. 

So when I get these kind of cravings, and I end up buying a calzone from a local eatery, I'm always disappointed with the outcome.  So this is when I have to take matters into my own hands and create my own damn calzone.   

Preheat oven to 425.  I used my go to pizza crust recipe.  And I browned some italian sausage.  I then mixed about a cup of ricotta cheese with a 1/2 up of Parmesan and 1/2 cup of mozzarella cheese (use the real stuff!!)  After my pizza dough had risen, I divided it into 4 balls and rolled each ball out to about a 6 inch round.  I then topped one side of the round with the ricotta mixture, then the sausage, then I added a few leaves of raw spinach.  Fold the empty side of the dough over the topping side and pinch to seal it off.  Place (carefully) onto a cookie sheet.  Brush the outside of the calzone with an egg wash, cut about 3 slits into the top of the calzone so you don't have a calzone blow out, and cook for about 15-18 minutes.  Keep checking the little bugger so it doesn't burn on the bottom.  Once it's to your desired brownness, take it out of the oven and let it cool for about 5 minutes.  Serve with your favorite marinara. 

I find that the stuff I make at home tastes better than the stuff I buy.  Maybe it's because of all the love that goes into making it, but seriously, try making your own items you crave.  You'll be so much more appreciative with the outcome than you would if you just went out and purchased it. 

Cheese Please!

This my friends, is my first attempt at Mozzarella cheese.  Yes.  I made it with my own two hands.  It's something I've been wanting to make forever and I finally got the balls to actually try it.  I was worried about it.  I mean it can't be easy to make cheese, right?  I thought my first attempt was going to be a disaster, but I'm quite impressed with how easy it was and with the final product.

Here's the deal with making cheese.  You have to have 3 specific ingredients to do it:
1. Milk that isn't ultra pasteurized.  Preferably milk from a local farm.  And luckily we have amazing food stores in Memphis called Easy-Way.  Which is where I purchased my 1/2 gallon of milk. It even came in a fancy little glass bottle, like when the milk man would deliver it.  (Ok, so I never in my life had the milk man deliver milk, but it's a fun visual).

2.  The next thing you need is Citric Acid.  To be quite honest, I really have no idea why the hell you have to have this ingredient, but in every cheese making recipe I read, it was listed.  And on the bottle it says it can be used as a substitute for salt, so putting two and two together, I assume it's some sort of preservative/flavoring used in cheese making.  If you really want to learn more about it, go here.

3.  And finally, you need Rennet.  What the hell is rennet, you ask?  Well that's exactly what I asked.  Rennet is a bunch of enzymes, found in the stomach of mammals that, in cheese making, causes milk to coagulate, separating the curds from the whey.  Luckily for the faint of heart, or the vegetarian variety, they have vegetable rennet.  That is what I used.  I found both my citric acid and my rennet on Amazon.com.  They both cost me about 15 bucks.  I've bought small chunks of cheese for that price. 

Here's the recipe I used.  It's really easy to follow and even has pictures!  HOORAY!  Trust me.  It's not scary.  I halved the recipe and that scared me because I felt like I was in a serious science project with cheese making.  But cheese is forgiving!  Gotta love that damn cheese!  It's good AND forgiving!  Here's the rest of my process:

This is what happens after you add in the vegetable rennet and let it sit for 5 minutes.  It solidifies the milk.  So cool!  The process is really fun and amazing.  If you have kids, I think they'd really enjoy helping!

 Little Miss Muffet ain't got shit on me!  Here's the separation of my curds and whey. 

Here's what you get after heating your milk to the desired temperature.  You then have to squeeze out all that whey. Which is a lot of fun. 

And it starts to look like ricotta cheese at first.  But the more you work with it, the more it begins to resemble mozzarella.

Yep!  That's my string of cheese.  I know it's blurry.  You try taking a picture holding moving cheese in one hand and a camera in the other! 

The only thing I did other than the recipe suggested was I added in some salt at the end.  In fact, I added in a GOOD pinch of salt and I think it still needed more.  So be sure to add in this step!


Happy Cheese Making!  Don't be afraid.  It's so cool!  

Okie Dokie, Artichokie

I am a sucker for artichokes.  They are my favorite vegetable.  Hands down.  I am also fascinated by them.  I mean who on earth would discover an artichoke and think, "hmm...I bet if I get past all these prickly leaves and then get rid of this hairy afro of a choke, there's a tender, tasty little heart in here that probably tastes like heaven"?  My sister and I used to have to share an artichoke when we were little.  Who knew two little girls would eventually try to kill each other over not receiving their fair share of the heart.  My mother quickly learned that we all needed our own choke to avoid future scuffles.  

I've had artichokes in a number of different ways.  In artichoke dips, on salads, boiled, stuffed, etc.  But it wasn't until recently that I tried a grilled artichoke.  And I was blown away.  It's so good, so smoky, and so much easier to eat than a boiled artichoke.  You can make an aioli to dip your artichoke in for extra flavor.  I like just melting a little butter and adding lemon to it for dipping.  

Here's the thing.  If you've never prepared and/or eaten a whole artichoke before they can be pretty intimidating.  And I'm pretty sure that if I tried to tell you how to do it, you'd be eating all the wrong parts.  So here's a link to help.

Here's How To Make Grilled Artichokes:  
Prepare a charcoal grill.  Follow the above link (Note...No need to trim off the stem for this recipe.  The stem becomes an extension of the heart and the more heart the better).  Once you get your choke all trimmed up, cut it in half.  You will notice a fuzzy choke.  You don't want that part.  So scoop it out with a spoon.  Now, throw your artichoke halves into a pot of boiling water for 20 minutes (you can apparently steam them this way too if you like, but I've never steamed an artichoke and I didn't want to mess anything up).  After 20 minutes, drain the artichokes and drizzle with olive oil, salt and pepper and grill for about 4-6 minutes on each side.  You really just want to add some color and some smoky charcoal goodness at this point.  Just don't burn em. 

When they are done, you can eat them.  Just avoid the rough part of the leaves.  Peel the leaves off and using your teeth, scrape the meaty edge of the leaf into your mouth.  Once all the leaves are gone, you are left with the best part to eat.  So eat it all...before I come and fight you for it.

 

It's the Little Things

It has come to my attention that many of you have forgotten key, valuable lessons that you were taught growing up. Your parents, guardians, siblings, friends and teachers taught you VERY basic things that you were supposed to use in your adult life.  But many of you have forgotten these things.  So let me take this time out of my life to reteach you.

You were taught to use your manners.  Please.  Thank You.  Excuse Me.  I'm Sorry.  You were taught the meaning of all these words.  When you need something from someone, you say, "Can I please...".  When someone does something for you, you say, "Thank you for..."  If you accidentally bump into someone you say, "Excuse me..."  and/or, "I'm sorry".  These are basics.  I was taught to use these words and I was taught to use them correctly.  I'm not sure when people decided that these were unnecessary terms.  They are not.  You need to remember to use them.  Always.

You were taught to put things away after you use them or you no longer need them.  They teach this in school and I'm pretty sure your mother or father taught you that when you are finished playing with or using something, you put it back where it belongs.  All things have places.  Take for instance grocery carts.  You took the cart to place your groceries in it.  You drove it all through the store.  You took it to the register to buy your groceries.  You then took it to your car to unload said groceries.  Why in the hell do you now think that you can just abandon your cart?  The cart that made your shopping experience so much easier.  You should be thanking your cart and putting it back in its place.  They have cart storage in the actual parking lots.  There are almost always an abundance of them.  It's not that hard to put it back.  Leaving it in another parking spot makes it hard for someone to park their car there.  And it makes someone else have to put it back. 

Speaking of grocery stores (but ALL stores included).  If you have something in your awesome, handy, dandy cart and then decide you don't want it.  PUT IT BACK.  Not somewhere else.  Put it back where you found it.  When I was growing up, I can't tell you how many times I heard the phrase, "Now put it back where you found it."  When I'm shopping and I find a package of chicken in the pasta aisle it drives me insane.  You have now just spoiled some perfectly good chicken and you have made someone's job more difficult.  You're the one who decided you didn't want it.  So put it back.    

You were taught to park within the lines.  I'm sure whoever taught you how to drive started you off with the simple skill of parking.  There are two white lines and you fit your car between them.  It's not hard.  You can't pass a driving test if you can't park your car.  So how have you all of a sudden, after many years of driving and perfecting this skill, decided that you can just create your own spot?  You can't.  It doesn't work like that.  If you can't fit your car within the lines, your car is either too big for your britches, you are too busy doing anything but driving your car, you just plain can't drive, or you are just an asshole.  Not parking in the lines screws up the entire dynamic of a parking lot.  

You were taught to clean up after yourself.  If you make a mess, clean it up.  Why do you think it's someone else's job to do it for you?  Parents...if you take your kid out to a restaurant, clean up after them.  I understand you will do anything in the world to prevent a meltdown.  Trust me.  I don't want to see your kid melt down either.  But if what keeps your kid calm is them ripping up 5,000 napkins into 345 million little pieces, pick it up when you leave.

If someone lets you out in traffic, a nice "thank you" wave is appreciated.  They didn't have to let you out, but they're gracious like that.  If I let you walk in front of me in a parking lot, put a little pep in your step to show a little gratitude.

You were taught to do the right thing.  When someone drops something and they don't notice, pick it up and give it back to them.  It will make their day.  People love being treated nicely.  When you find something that is apparently lost, turn it in.  Do you know how many people come up to me at the end of the night looking for a wallet or a phone that they lost?  And do you know how quickly I become their best friend when I tell them someone turned it in?  The relief on their face is enough to make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

I'm not perfect.  I have done (or haven't done) one or two of these things.  But after having to deal with it so many times, you learn to do the right thing.  

Did you know that there are 7 + BILLION people in the world?  You are not the only one here.  Be courteous.  If we all just stopped for a minute, I know you're busy, but just take one minute to stop and think about how doing small things could make our world a better place.  If you took 1 day to be conscious of how you treat people around you, and how what you do affects the lives of so many people, you might notice that you can afford to make a few adjustments to be a better person.  And making yourself a better person today is bound to make someone else a better person tomorrow.  

Hidden Memphis Gem

Maybe all of you knew about this place, but I surely had never heard of it, or heard it even mentioned.  It's called Cordova Farmer's Market, located at 1150 N. Germantown Pkwy.  No, it's not like the downtown, Cooper Young, or botanical garden farmer's markets.  It's a grocery store.  An international grocery store.  And if you love to cook as much as I do, you can find anything your heart desires here.  They have food from every nation, fresh fish, and the most elaborate layout of produce I have ever seen.  I didn't know what half of the shit on display was.  And I can't quite describe how awesome this place is.  You have to go there to see for yourself.  Here are a few pictures from my last trip.  Did I mention that it's cheap.  Go check it out if you haven't been there.  And if you have, shame on you for not telling me about it.

 Look at that dragon fruit on the left!!  Gorgeous!

Many, many fresh fish options

I have no idea what any of this is, but it's so cool!

 It is said that this fruit smells like absolute hell, but is the sweetest thing you'll ever eat!  I was afraid it would stink up my car, so I didn't get it this time.  I'll keep you posted if I get up the nerve to try it.)

More fresh fish

 

Interesting produce

 

  Rows of fresh shrimp, oysters, mussels, clams, etc.

Awesome Blossoms

 

This, my friends, is a squash blossom.  It is the flower from a squash plant.  And I have been seeing these things on practically every food show and menu for the past few years, but I have never eaten one.  

A wonderful person I know has heard me talk of these blossoms for a few weeks now, seeing as how they are in season and so I was recently presented with my very own package of squash blossoms, straight from the Memphis Farmer's Market.  I know what you're thinking.  You're thinking that I work for the Farmer's Market.  Which is why I keep talking about it.  Well you're wrong.  I don't.  I DO, however, volunteer my time to help them as often as I can.  Why you ask?  Because I love having locally grown food at my fingertips and I'll do whatever I can to help keep it in business.  It's inspiring to walk around the farmer's market.  It's educational, stimulating and amazing.  So that's why I keep bringing it up.  If you've been there you know how I feel.  If you haven't, you should go.  If you volunteer there, you're awesome.  And if you don't, you should.  And if you don't live in Memphis, make it a point to go to your own local farmer's market.

Back to squash blossoms.  As soon as I got them, I started to research them.  You can do a lot with them.  But most of the recipes I found had them stuffed with some type of cheese and/or bacon and then battered and fried.  I didn't want them to be fried.  And I didn't want bacon to overpower them.  I wanted to taste them, and I felt like if I fried them, they were BOUND to be delicious, but they would taste like all fried food.  So I stuffed mine with cheese and baked them.  Rather than cheesed and baconed them (see what I did there??)  And they were awesome. 

Here's What I Did:

Preheat oven to 350.  

Inside of the squash blossom is a little stamen or pistil (depending on whether or not it's a male or female flower).  You want to remove this part.  At least that's what most of the recipes I read said.  There were a few that didn't mention it at all, but I heard these parts are bitter and I wanted nothing to taint my first experience with a squash blossom.  Then mix about 1 cup of ricotta cheese, 1/4 cup of Parmesan cheese, 1 teaspoon of chopped garlic, 1 tablespoon of chopped chives and 1 tablespoon of chopped parsley.  Salt and pepper to taste.  Add this mixture to a ziplock bag and snip the corner.  Now...pipe this mixture CAREFULLY into the squash blossom and twist the flower around the mixture.  Cook for about 5 minutes.  But keep your eye on it.

As you can see from below, you are going to lose some cheese.  This may be why so many people go for the battering and then frying technique.  But I assure you.  This recipe is good.  The squash blossom has such a delicately sweet flavor.  And who the hell doesn't love herbed, garlicy cheese?  And if all else fails, you tried something new.  And loved it.  Promise. 

 

Get Galette

I'm not the best baker.  I fear failure.  I'm too impatient and too meticulous for baking.  I read too far into it.  I over think it.  And in turn, I mess it up.  Cookies don't rise or don't brown, cakes sink, pies burn.  Which is strange because my mom makes the best homemade pies in the universe.  I just do much better when I can throw a bunch of things into a saute pan and brown them.  However, I bought a pint of blueberries for .99 cents at the grocery store that shall not be named (because I despise it) and I had a leftover pie crust from the delicious Tomato pie recipe I made the other day and I wanted to use them both.  I have seen numerous chefs make galettes and they seem really easy to make and you don't have to know how to make them look pretty, like you do with pies, they just do.  So here's the recipe I didn't follow to a tee (although I'm quite certain if you do, it will be wonderful).

Here's What I Did Different:
Obviously, I have already confessed to the fact that I cheated on the pie crust part.  Shoot me.  I fear baking failure.  But I promise to get over that fear, one galette at a time.  I halved the recipe because I only had 2 cups of blueberries.  So instead of trying to get 1/2 tsp. of lemon zest out of the lemon, I just sprinkled the juice of 1/2 the lemon over the blueberries.  And I used cane sugar instead of granulated.  And I obviously didn't have any parchment paper, so I used aluminum foil.  I was a little nervous that the folding over of the crust would be difficult, but it wasn't.  At all.

So there we have it.  It didn't fail.  It's super duper easy.  And it's out of this world delicious.  Especially with ice cream.  Get Geletting. 

My bleeding galette

Boiled Peanut Hummus

 

So, there must be some thing about boiled peanuts.  As in, only Southerners like them.  Or at least that's what my perception was after having eaten some boiled peanuts at a friend's house recently.  He offered me some and then said, "Do you like boiled peanuts?  Most Northerners don't."  Well first of all let me start by saying I'm not like most Northerners.  I love the North.  I love where I'm from.  I spent 25 years of my life in the North (half in Pittsburgh and half in West Virginia, which sorry WV, I consider you North after living in the South).  But now that I've spent time in the South, I realize that I have always been a Southern girl trapped in the body of a Yankee.  I don't do the cold.  I love grits, cornbread, greens, country ham, pimento cheese, chow chow and fried pickles.  I prefer gravy on my fries to ketchup, I say ya'll, and I suck the head when I eat crawfish.  And...I like boiled peanuts.  

But...they do have to grow on you.  The first time I tried one I was turned off by the texture and the wetness.  But you get past that.  Boiled peanuts are raw peanuts or green peanuts.  You can't just buy roasted peanuts and boil them.  You have to get them raw and then boil them.  (I found raw peanuts at SuperLo in Memphis.  Never seen them anywhere else in the city.)  

Here's How You Do It:

Put your peanuts in a large stock pot.  Cover with water (you are going to have to place something on them so they are all submerged).  Add in 1/2 cup of kosher salt, 1/4 cup cider vinegar, 1 tablespoon of garlic powder, 1 tablespoon of onion powder, 1/2 tablespoon of crushed red pepper flakes and 1/2 teaspoon of cayenne pepper.  Add in more of anything you like, some people use Old Bay, etc.  Cover your peanuts with another pot or bowl to weight them down and then wait.  For EVER.  I'm not kidding.  You have to boil them for about 7 hours.  So do this on a rainy day.  We usually start testing our peanuts after about 6 hours.  This is when you want to adjust your seasoning.  We added more salt.  Yes I know, seems like a lot.  But boiled peanuts are salty.  When they are done, you want them to be creamy.  Not like mush creamy.  But like kidney bean creamy with a slight snap (or al dente) still left in the peanut.  That's it.  That's boiled peanuts.  They are addicting as all hell.

 

Peanuts boiling under a bowl so they cook evenly.

finished product - boiled peanuts

 

Boiled Peanut Hummus:

1 cup of boiled peanuts (shelled)

2 cloves of garlic

2 tablespoons of tahini (use peanut or almond butter if you don't have tahini)

Juice from the half of 1 lemon (I used lime in this recipe and it was still awesome)

1/4 cup of olive oil

Cayenne to taste (unless you added in a bunch of cayenne to your peanuts, which we did, so we didn't have to season with anything other than pepper)

Mix everything in a food processor.  Add in water until you get it to the consistency you like.  I like mine to have some body.  And serve with veggies, tortilla chips, etc.  It is SOOOOO good that I eat half of it just testing for the right seasoning.  And now I'm not hungry for dinner because I just ate a ton of boiled peanut hummus.  Don't be afraid to try it.  In fact...if you are afraid of trying boiled peanuts, start with boiled peanut hummus.  Because you will be FLOORED by how good it is, and then those little boiled peanuts won't be so weird anymore.  TRUST ME! 

This recipe is inspired by Hugh Acheson's cookbook A New Turn in the South.  You know Hugh Acheson.  The uni-brow chef.  He's weird.  And I love him for it.  And he makes a bad ass boiled peanut hummus.  And if it weren't for him, I'd never have eaten it.  And I wouldn't be about to go finish it all off right this very second.       

My, My, Tomato Pie

Tomato season is one of my favorite times of the year.  It's right up there with Halloween and Thanksgiving.  It should actually be a holiday.  Because there is never another time during the year when you can purchase tomatoes that taste like candy.  EVER.  Yeah, yeah, I know you can BUY tomatoes year round.  But they taste like crap.  During tomato season, they are juicy, sweet, and beautifully colored.  They smell like what a tomato should smell like.  Add a little salt and pepper and you really could eat vine-ripened tomatoes like an apple.

On a recent trip to the Memphis Farmer's Market, I passed by a stall that had THE MOST GORGEOUS tomatoes in the entire lot.  And I'm an asshole because I didn't even take the time to look at what farm they came from.  I was too busy being mesmerized by these plump, sexy, redder than red tomatoes.  And at $5 for 5 enormous maters, I was sold and my mind immediately started to think about what I was going to do with them.

Tomato Pie.  I've been craving tomato pie all Summer long.  I've never made a tomato pie.  I've never even eaten a tomato pie, if we're not counting pizza here.  But I imagined it as a pie with layers of tomatoes and cheese and I thought, how on Earth could this go wrong?  So I pulled up a recipe I had been eying and I rushed to the grocery store to buy a pie crust (whatever...don't judge.  I had 2 hours before I had to be at work and I wasn't in the mood to make a damn crust from scratch).

And here's what happened!    

Here's the recipe.

And here are the changes I made/would make:
1.  I bought my crust.  But in the future I would make my own.  Not that Pillsbury doesn't make a good crust, I just think it would put this dish over the top if it had a homemade crust.
2.  I didn't have any fresh thyme, so I just left it out.  But I LOVE thyme, so I will definitely use it the next thyme.
3.  I added crushed red pepper to the cheese mixture to add a little spice.
4.  I think the next time I will add some roasted garlic.  Because I think everything is better with garlic.
5.  I didn't let my tomatoes sit as long as the recipe said, but it really didn't make much of a difference.  My crust wasn't soggy.  I think as long as you remove the seeds and dry them good with paper towels, they should be good.

So there you have it.  My first tomato pie.  Will DEFINITELY not be my last!